Psychological and emotional abuse

Calling you horrible names like stupid, an idiot or ugly, being a bad parent, making you feel ashamed, worthless.  You may not be allowed to go out alone, your partner may be checking on you all of the time,  calling you on your mobile while you are out, ignoring you or giving you the silent treatment, saying you are fat, mad or ill. 

 

Physical

Bruising, cuts, welts, burns anywhere on your body, loss of hair in clumps, pulling your hair, being pushed, shoved, slapped, hit, bit, scratched etc. 

 

Sexual

When someone does something to your body that you don’t want.  It can happen to men or women of any age. It includes unwanted kissing or touching, rough or violent sex, refusing to use condoms or restricting someone’s access to birth control, stopping someone from protecting themselves from sexually transmitted infections (STIs). Rape or attempted rape can occur even if you are married.

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Economic abuse

Controlling your money, taking your pay, checking your shopping receipts, making you justify what you are buying, making you ask for money or just giving you an allowance, refusing to let you claim benefits, preventing you from working or studying.

 

Coercive or Controlling behaviour

Controlling and bullying you to do things that you don’t want to do.  You may have stopped seeing your friends and family.  There may be threats to harm or kill you or your child or other family members. You may be told that you will be reported to the police or other authorities such as Social Services or threatened to have your child taken away.  Your property, personal or household goods may get damaged and you may be forced to take part in child abuse or other criminal activity. 

 

Harassment and stalking

Stalking is persistent and unwanted attention, it makes you feel like you are being pestered.  You may feel scared, anxious or harassed.  You may be followed or aware that someone is keeping track of where you go or even feeling someone is spying on you.  Unwanted messages on your phone or via social media may be frequent or you receive unwanted gifts such as flowers, chocolate, even jewellery.

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Below is a list of ways that you can be abused by your partner and these can be considered domestic abuse:

 

• They may call you names, insult you or put you down.

• They can try to prevent you from going to school or work.

• You may be stopped from seeing your family members and friends.

• There may be an attempt to control how you spend money, where you go or what you wear.

• They can act jealous or possessive and accuse you of being unfaithful.

• They will try to control whether you can see a health care provider or may accompany you to an appointment.

• Sometimes they will threaten you with violence or a weapon.

• Other acts of violence include being hit, kicked, shoved, slapped, choked or otherwise hurt you, your children or your pets

• They may force you to have sex or engage in sexual acts against your will.

• You may be blamed for his or her violent behaviour or tell you that you deserve it.

• They may threaten to tell friends, family, colleagues or even community members of your sexual orientation or gender identity.